Expecting a new baby? Telling your older child your pregnant can be a daunting task. Say it the wrong way, and all hell can break loose but say it the right way, and they will be anxiously counting down the days.
A new baby brings joys and challenges to a family. Here are some tips on telling your older children the good news!Click To TweetSharing the Good News With Your Older Child
Tell your older child that you are going to have a new baby early in the pregnancy. You don’t want them to overhear the news accidentally and start the journey on the wrong note.
However, try not to talk too much about the baby because most children’s first reaction is jealousy. You don’t want them to think, “mom is having another baby, and she doesn’t need me anymore.”
The “baby” topic definitely shouldn’t be the only thing you are discussing at home. That can get real old quick.
Pregnancy Isn’t An Excuse
If mom is having a hard pregnancy and feels sick or is too tired to play with your older child, don’t ever say it’s because of the baby. That will quickly make your older child feel resentment towards the younger one even before it’s born.
If she feels sick, tell the child that mom is tired and needs some rest. This is also a good time for you to have some one-on-one time with your older child.
If mom usually does everything for your child, make the switch to daddy as fun as possible. You want the change to feel like a reward, not as a punishment.
Explain About Your Pregnancy And The New Baby
If your child asks where babies come from, be as brief as possible. If they are still young, say something like the baby is growing in mommy’s tummy, and when it is large enough, it will come out so you can hold it.
Do not explain more than you have been asked. Use simple words and do not go into any details. Do not lie.
So, in this sense – if the child is not asking any questions, don’t start explaining anything.
Your Older Child Hates The Idea Of A New Sibling
Sometimes children hate the idea of a new baby. They will tell you they don’t want it or even try to convince you that YOU don’t need it. This reaction is pretty normal and natural for young children.
If your child has an adverse reaction, tell them that they don’t have to love or take care of the baby. Be prepared to live through your own little piece of hell if the older child starts to act hostile.
Don’t be mad. Instead, try to understand that they are acting this way because they are scared and confused.
Can’t Wait for Their New Sibling
Children are very intuitive. Many will react positively to the good news to make you happy. And still, remember that no matter how happy the older child seems to be, they need to be reassured that mom and dad will always be mom and dad. No matter what.
Play with your child, go out together and only talk about the baby if they bring it up.
This is great advice, thanks for sharing! I was lucky with my three kids, they were so excited about having a new brother and sister. Even now they are begging for us to have another. Talking about all of the positives really help.
That’s awesome your kids were always excited to have a new sibling
Expecting a baby shouldn’t have a negative impact on siblings. You give excellent pointers in this article! Thank you for sharing!
Having a new brother or sister is an adjustment for a lot of kids, but thankfully most times they are super happy about it.
My daughter was 6 when I became pregnant again. I’m glad I didn’t tell her…I lost the baby to a miscarriage and was never able to conceive again. But these are all good tips for those lucky enough to have more than one child.
So sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I’ve been there and it’s not fun!